HOT OFF THE PRESS: PETER PUCK IS IN THE SLAMMER

Assets? Assets? I have no assets.

Well, well, well. Just when I was running out of ideas. Just as I was suffering from writer’s block. Just when this bloody depression was really starting to get me down, along comes a truly inspiring news item to get the juices flowing.

Yesterday the ex-Canadian and rip-off connoisseur Peter Pocklington was taken from his luxurious digs in Palm Desert by ten armed FBI agents. His destination? The slammer located in the gritty mean streets of Riverside California. He is under arrest and facing charges for bankruptcy fraud. See:
http://ca.reuters.com/article/sportsNews/idCATRE52A73N20090312?sp=true

The whole episode scared the hell out of his long-suffering, loyal and faithful 87 year-old mother Eileen who was visiting with Pocklington and his wife at the time. The old girl said “We were still in bed, they broke the lock and came in. . . . There was 10 of them . . . . I heard all this banging, I think, ‘What on earth are the neighbours doing?’ Bang, bang, bang. . . . Little did I know.” She added that she had no idea her boy was in trouble. She said, “I just couldn’t believe, never in my life would I ever believe. . . . He has always been fine.” Yes, yes. Dear me. Ahem.

It must have been all of that bad company that led her misunderstood boy astray. Guys like Gretzky, I suppose, or Marc Messier. Poor kid. And she had such high hopes for him. She said young Peter – age 67 - told her when she got off the plane for her visit that he was all excited about “another big deal, I forget what country.” Indeed.
See: http://www.calgaryherald.com/news/Oilers+owner+Pocklington+charged+with+fraud/1378333/story.html
With Pocklington obviously believing, much like fellow ex-Canadian in a U.S. jail Conrad Black, that ordinary laws applied to ordinary people and that he was anything but ordinary, prosecutors say Pocklington recently made an assignment in bankruptcy attesting to 20 million in debts and – get this – 3000 measly bucks in assets. The gendarmes now accuse Pocklington of hiding bank accounts, assets in offshore companies, and spinning off art and fine furniture to his buddies, all of which he failed to mention in his sworn declarations. Last year a bankruptcy trustee was chasing him for about 300 grand that he allegedly received from auctioning some of his sports memorabilia from his glory days as Edmonton Oilers’ Peter Puck.

With any luck the outcome of his current tribulations could be the last we hear from this lamentable weasel and welcher on commitments to our government, his creditors, and even children. See: http://darrylraymaker.blogspot.com/2008/10/peter-puck-welches-on-commitment-to.html

For further information on this sterling character see: http://business.theglobeandmail.com/servlet/story/RTGAM.20081219.rmpuck1218/BNStory/Business

The former candidate for the leadership of the Progressive Conservative Party and – as the much missed tiny perfect scandal sheet Frank Magazine used to say – 'shameless self promoter', will be behind bars in his orange jump suit until his trial if the prosecutors have their way.

As to the self-promotion and philosophy of this paragon of rectitude his website makes for interesting reading. See: http://www.peterpocklington.com/

The burning question now is will the welching, narcissist Pocklington join Conrad Black and David Radler among the ex-directors of the Fraser Institute who are also convicted felons? The Institute also boasts among its current ranks senior policy analyst, disgraced Harper speech-writer and admitted plagiarist, Dr. Owen Lippert.