TORY MLA DOUG ELNISKI: A TWITTERING TWIT

Doug Elniski as a Young Man

Doug Elniski, MLA for Edmonton Calder today

For those Canadians who live in parts of Canada other than my beloved Alberta, don’t think you are missing anything. Apart from substandard roads and health care, a lack of schools, services for seniors, adequate nursing homes, and overcrowded universities, many of the province’s citizens are represented by Progressive Conservative members such as Doug Elniski.

The knuckle-dragging 6 ‘ 7” Elniski who drives a smart car, squeaked out a victory against the NDP in Edmonton Calder in the last provincial election. Over the past few days he has shown that he is right on top of things when it comes to new technology by revealing his proficiency at twittering. Obviously using the technology for his official purposes, he recently twittered his followers that they should direct their attention to a bikini car wash where “girls look cold.”

In addition, In his capacity as an MLA he attended the Edmonton gay pride parade a few days ago. While attending to his official functions he tastefully twittered to his avid followers that at one point he was "surrounded by bumping and grinding lesbians."
Read: http://www.calgaryherald.com/news/Tory+draws+fire+offensive+Twitter+posts/1723327/story.html
But that’s not all. Recently while using the new technology to publicize his lofty views on junior high school graduations, Elniski posted some homespun advice to young girls. Elniski declared that "Men are attracted to smiles, so smile and don't give me that 'treated equal' stuff, if you want equal it comes in little packages at Starbucks."

He also opined, "There is nothing a man wants less than a woman scowling because he thinks he is going to get sh--for something and has no idea what."

For more of Elniski’s twittering intellectual musings, read: http://twitter.com/ElniskiMLA?max_id=2255128223&page=2&twttr=true

The publicity generated by the offending posts brought forth considerable derision from many thoughtful Albertans thus prompting Elniski to expunge his musings from the internet. He observed, “"To be honest with you, I feel kind of foolish because as I go back and look at it now I can say I never, ever should have done what I did." Indeed.

Elniski’s gaffes came only a few days after Stelmach’s Finance Minister Iris Evans said in a speech in Toronto that families with two working parents did not properly care for their children. Like the erudite Elniski, the high positioned ditz also apologized for her offensive comments.

Tom Olsen, a former Calgary Herald columnist and prominent Tory cheerleader during the dark ages of the Klein years, is now Premier Stelmach’s mouthpiece on damage control matters. He reported that Stelmach is not considering disciplinary action against this Neanderthal Calder MLA.

So, all you Canadians out there in the hinterland, you are not missing much!